Love Me Again Page 4

  “Oh, Jas. I’m so sorry. I cannot apologize enough for the pain I’ve caused you. But, I promise I will spend the rest of our lives making up to you. So, when you get married and have babies, I’ll babysit, and for free.”

  “Yes, ma’am and I’m going to hold you to that. Okay, enough of the sad talk, how was Florida?”

  “How did you know I lived in Florida?”

  “Oops. Let’s just say that you will never get away from the Booth family, honey. We will put an all-points bulletin out on you. Now, I’ve already said much too much. Can we just enjoy the rest of the night? I’m hungry. Have you eaten?”

  “I’m hungry too. And from the looks of things, Jasper took the liberty of buying all my favorite foods, fruits, and snacks. Come on, let's find something to munch on.”

  “I’m right behind you. I’m so happy to have you back home.”

  Chapter Eight

  “Wow, you really know how to cook.”

  “Mom taught me from the time I was five. She said men needed to know their way around the kitchen in case their wives were ever pregnant or sick.”

  “Now that’s wise. Where is she now? I need to thank her.”

  “She’s alongside my dad in heaven. My parents were killed on a mission trip to China.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry.”

  “Just as you told me, don’t be. My parents had been spreading the Gospel together since they were teenagers. It was only befitting that they left this world together. I was an only child and was raised by my god-parents, Jasper and Jessica Booth.”

  “So, you and Jasper are more than partners, you are brothers.”

  “Exactly.”

  “How interesting.”

  “What? That we are brothers, or that you now have me to pick for information about J.J.?”

  “Actually, I have all the information I need about him and enough to know that I’m not interested.”

  “But you were.”

  “Of course, I noticed him. Mainly because you are not as open or friendly. Just as handsome, but not as warm.”

  “My sister always says I’m too uptight.”

  “I wouldn’t use the word uptight, but maybe guarded.”

  “Yes, I think it’s more guarded. I just believe in the Word and, it says we have to be careful for nothing.”

  “I do, too, but I’ve learned to be wise as a serpent and humble as a dove. You find out everything you need to know about people like that.”

  “So what did you find out about me?”

  “That because you are so guarded, you’ve never allowed yourself to fall in love. And that whenever a woman does get you, she’ll have someone she can trust with her whole heart.”

  “And if I might ask, who told you that?”

  “And spill my source. That wouldn’t be being wise as a serpent but instead dumb as the devil.” They both laughed.

  “For real, I think that Mr. and Mrs. Booth raised some awesome men. So, I would guess that you are thirty-three?”

  “I see you have your Dad’s gifts. I am thirty-three and I will be thirty-four the day after Christmas.”

  “Say it isn’t so!”

  “Then, I would be telling a lie. Why?”

  “My dad was born on December the twenty-sixth.”

  “I knew he was special because he planted you, but now I know he was even more special because of that Capricorn effect.”

  “You don’t strike me as the type who believes in Zodiac signs.”

  “I’m not. I just believe that all December babies have a special quality, but they can be mean if you make them.”

  “No one can make you mean, Kane, but my dad was known to ruffle some feathers. He was straight to the point and forward. People hated that about him.”

  “Same with me. I just believe that if I don’t say what I’m really feeling, then I’m lying to myself and the person with whom I’m conversing with or about.”

  “This is freaky and weird. So, tell me this, why haven’t you ever been in love?”

  “Who says I haven’t?”

  “You almost slicked me out of my source, but you have to get up early in the morning to pull one on me.”

  “I see.”

  “Well, why?”

  “Basically, I was waiting for someone like my mother. I remember so little about her but the things I do remember, I want to see that in a woman. Like, washing your hands before you fix plates. Or, being willing to even cook. A lot of women our age don’t even go in the kitchen unless they are grabbing a soda. Well, I like Kool-aid, and I don’t want a woman who looks down on my drink of choice.”

  “I understand. It blew me away when you said you’d made Kool-aid.”

  “I saw it in your eyes.”

  “I absolutely would rather a glass of Kool-aid over soda water any day.”

  “Soda water?”

  “Yes, that’s what my mom calls it, so I’ve adapted to that. Funny to you, huh?”

  “Yes, it is. You sound like our cousins in Texas. But hey, Kool-aid is Kool-aid wherever you are.”

  “Exactly.”

  “Would you like dessert?”

  “Did you make dessert too?”

  “Actually, I stopped by Julianne’s Bakery and grabbed two pieces of cheesecake and two pieces of chocolate cake. Which would you prefer?”

  “The chocolate cake.”

  “Me too. I’ll grab it out of the refrigerator.”

  “And while you are doing that, could you pour me a glass of milk, and I will wash dishes and put away the food.”

  “Girl, you better not spoil me, I’m telling you. It’s hard for a man to receive good treatment and all of a sudden it stops. I will take you to court and sue you on the grounds of pretentious dealings.”

  “There’s no such thing.”

  “Okay, try me and see won’t I take all of your money you making over there at Esplanade’s.”

  “And I will sue you for false accusations and defamation of character. Now, if you want to play, I’m the girl to play with.”

  “I’m sorry, ma’am. I take it back. Do as much as you like and when you get tired, I’m just going to thank my lucky stars that you did as much as you did.”

  “Now that sounds like a grateful brother and not someone who wants something but has forgotten to be grateful.”

  “I promise, I will never forget to exercise gratitude whereas it concerns you Ms. Kimbrel, and starting today, I’m going to always show you how grateful I am to be considered your friend.”

  “And I likewise, Mr. Kane Jackson/Booth. Now, please hurry and pour my milk, but also put some ice-cubes in my glass.”

  “Say it isn’t so.”

  “That I drink ice with my milk?”

  “Yes.”

  “Well, sir, I won’t because if you bring me a glass of milk without ice, I’m not drinking it.”

  “A woman after my very own heart.” After the dishes were finished, they sat down in front of the television to watch a couple of episodes of Veronica’s favorite show, The Golden Girls.

  Chapter Nine

  Jasper hung his jacket on the back of the chair and walked into his kitchen. He never really bought food for his house, but he always bought wine. Mainly, because by the time he’d made it home, he had eaten and needed something to calm him down. He took the chilled glass out of the freezer and poured himself a glass of white Zinfandel. He turned the glass up and drunk the wine in two gulps. He never consumed alcohol at this rate of consumption, but tonight was exceptional.

  Jade was some piece of work. Flip enough to make him mad and bull-headed enough to make him drink. She still thought the world and him revolved around her. But she was in for the shock of her life if she thought she was going to mistreat him and he still takes care of her.

  The reality was, she didn’t even know.

  Should I tell her?

  Now, that would really make her mad. At least, he’d make her eat dust, but that wasn’t even a thrill for him. He loved this woman
with everything in him. The good and the bad...all packaged together made her who he fell in love with. But from the looks of things, she didn’t feel the same.

  Jasper still hadn’t heard from Jasmine since he’d sent her to visit. So he picked up his phone, entered his passcode, and hit the Message button.

  Jasmine, how is Jade? You never text me to let me know how things were going???

  He waited what seemed like forever for a two-word reply... ‘We straight.’

  That alone caused him to understand the obvious. Jade was done with him. She was no longer in love with him and it was far time for him to stop hanging on to a wish and a prayer. Jasper placed his phone on the charger and turned off the lights. If he could only turn the lights off in his heart.

  Jasper ran the water in his shower, got in, and allowed the water to drench his tears away. People often tease men about crying, but at this point, tears were the only thing keeping him from dying inside. He could barely wait to jump out the shower to get another glass of wine.

  Drinking was never his go-to for stress but at this point he was willing to use anything he could to drown out the pain. After his shower, he quickly dried himself off, wrapped a towel around his waist, went into the kitchen and poured himself another glass of wine. This time, he took sips as he walked back into his bedroom. Jasper sat the glass on the nightstand next to his bed, said a prayer, and laid back on his pillows staring at the ceiling.

  Fortunately, he fell asleep before he could complete the second glass. Drinking was never his go-to for stress, but at this point he was willing to use anything.

  Jasper drifted deep into sleep.

  I hate you, Jasper.

  But, Jade, I love you.

  I never want to see you again.

  But, Jade. Jade. Jade.

  Jasper snatched himself from the nightmare, laid his head back against his pillow, and plundered. Lord, what are you trying to tell me? Should I just tell Jade that I am the one who did all the things I did? Is she going to hate me?

  He picked up his phone, hit the power button to awaken it, and stared at the time. It was two-thirty and he had to be awake by six. He pushed the wine glass away from the edge of the nightstand and put his phone back in the phone holder on the radio. Surely, he couldn’t call her now, but he needed to settle this in his heart and in his mind. If she hated him, oh well, he was only doing what he promised to do.

  He closed his eyes wishing sleep would fall back on him, but it didn’t. Jasper grabbed his phone again and hit the Pandora app. He moved the screen with his thumb until he landed on something he felt would equal his mood. He selected the Amy Winehouse station. The first song the station played was his theme song because his tears had definitely dried on their own.

  He couldn’t even cry about Jade anymore.

  For what? So she could step all over his heart over and over again. Not going to happen.

  It was more than time for him to start his life all over again. There were more women in town who wanted him, and maybe it was time for him to look elsewhere. Maybe, his love had gone as far as it could go, but one thing was for sure, Jasper was tired of having sleepless nights because of Jade.

  “Lord, why does this woman make my heart hurt so bad? Why in the world am I still concerned about Jade Bishop? You must give me the strength to move on.” And at that very moment, Jasper made up his mind exactly who he would be taking to the Christmas in The Field event, Veronica Kimbrel.

  Veronica was pretty and she was willing to stand instead of run. Just what he needed. Someone who was willing to stand in the face of adversity, instead of someone running like they had no one to love. Or, as if they cared about no one’s feeling except their very own.

  “At least I wouldn’t be falling short,” Jasper said as he threw his body back on his pillow.

  He finally drifted back to sleep.

  “Look! She has a gun.”

  “What is she doing with that?”

  “Man, she’s going to kill us. What the heck did you do to this woman, Jasper?”

  “Kane, I promise I didn’t do anything but take her to a dance. She knew that I still loved Jade. She even said that we should be friends and now she acting all crazy.”

  “Man, you knew better than to play with someone’s feelings. Why didn’t you just leave her alone? And now, you’ve put all of our lives in danger.”

  “Who knew she was crazy. I thought the woman had things altogether. I thought she was sensible and smart.”

  “You also thought she was stupid because you figured you’d use her to make Jade jealous, and now she’s showing you how playing games with people’s feelings could end in you and the people around you losing their lives.”

  “I’m so sorry, Kane. Man, I just didn’t know.”

  “You can keep your apology. I haven’t even had a chance to find love and you’ve robbed me of that.”

  Pow. Pow. Pow.

  Jasper jumped out of his sleep again.

  “Shoot!” He screamed as he grabbed his chest, happy it was just a dream.

  “Lord, why do I feel like you telling me that would be wrong to do. Anyone else in my position would do the same thing.”

  “It is written in Matthew 7, ‘In everything, therefore, treat people the same way you want them to treat you, for this is the Law and the Prophets. Enter through the narrow gate; for the gate is wide and the way is broad that leads to destruction, and there are many who enter through it. For the gate is small and the way is narrow that leads to life, and there are few who find it.’”

  “Okay Lord, I get it. I’m going to the Christmas party by myself.”

  Jasper looked at his phone and realized this time, he might as well get up. He went to the shower and started the water.

  Chapter Ten

  Jade was an early riser, which gave her the perfect opportunity to go before the Lord in prayer. Her grandmother always said, ”The earlier you go before the throne, the more likely your prayers will be the first to be answered.” For years, she’s been bombarding heaven before most of her friends.

  She opened the door to what used to be their prayer room and was so shocked to see prayers written all over the walls. Her grandmother had every prayer she prayed for Jade etched on the wall in beautiful letters. She didn’t know whether to pray or cry, so she did both.

  “Father, thank You for such a heavenly soul who embodied everything I strive to be. Thank You for giving her the foresight to remember me, even when she was experiencing her roughest moments. Father, I honor You for her very life and mine. Now, before I get this day started, I pray that You will order my steps and guide me in the direction I should go. Teach me how to honor You in my actions, and give me the courage to stay here to do what You have ordained me to do. Strengthen my friends, bless them indeed, and open doors for them according to Your goodness and their prayers, in the name of the Lord. Amen.”

  Jade got off her knees and went into the kitchen.

  If Jasmine hadn’t changed, breakfast was her favorite meal. The least she could do for her coming to save her from herself was cook.

  Jade made some homemade pancake batter and poured it onto the waffle maker. She scrambled four eggs and used the back burner to fry some shredded chicken. She turned on the kitchen radio mounted underneath the cabinets and hummed to Tasha Cobb’s single, “You Know My Name.”

  “I thought I heard your beautiful voice and smelled your famous waffles.”

  “Well, lady, I was just about to come get you. Go wash up and by the time you come back, your omelet will be finished.”

  “You still make those chicken omelets?”

  “Yes, and I’m making you one this morning.”

  “Awesome.”

  “So, is Jasper dating?”

  “Straight to the point, huh? Who is going to date that Jade-sprung nut? Now, I know a couple of women who would love to have your spot, but they’re too afraid you’ll come waltzing home—as you have—and mess up their entire lives.”


  “Jasmine.”

  “Jade.”

  “See, the dilemma you’ve put him in. My brother loves you with everything in him. Always have and always will. But will he ever love you again the way he did? I’m not sure. If it were me, I’d never give you a chance to wreck my life again.”

  “I’m that bad.”

  “You’re not bad, Jade, but what you did was foul. Do you want the truth or some fluff?”

  “I want the truth, Jas.”

  “Like I said, it took him almost three months to shake back. Dad darn near had to threaten him to get him out of the bed. Mom was so angry with you, but Dad smoothed things over. He, for some reason, had more compassion on you than any of us.”

  “Maybe it’s because he’s the only one I could call. I had no one but him.”

  “We figured as much when he kept defending you and pleading with J.J. to give you time. We suspected he knew something deeper than we did.”

  “He was a God-send for me and I appreciated him not betraying me.”

  “Well, you and Jasper have to talk. I believe that you will be able to share things with him and he with you that will open both of your eyes.”

  “I’m so afraid of that moment, but I know it’s coming. I owe him all types of apologies.”

  “You do, but we all have to sometimes. Apologize. We aren’t perfect, Jade, and no one expects us to be. We just have to do what we know is right to do. I understand why you left.”

  “So you think you know, huh?”

  “You’re my sister, and I know that everyone you have ever loved has died except my family. You just felt like if you loved us, the Lord will take us too.”

  Jade began to cry. She’d never spoken this aloud to anyone. She raised her head and looked into the eyes of Jasmine who, too, was now crying and asked, “How did you know that, Jasmine?”

  “Because you are my sister. I’ve studied you for years because I wanted to be just like you. I know how you think, Jade, and I’m sure Jasper knew too.”

  “I just couldn’t live with myself…”